It is amazing how times like this make you really grateful for the small things. Before I had these babies, my view on my upcoming motherhood was totally different and more self-centered. I remember when anticipating motherhood my worries were more about me than my babies. I would often be worried about how the babies would affect me, my freedom, my budget, my figure, my social life, ect. I don't think I really appreciated what a gift it is to be a mother.
After I went into preterm labor and was told I might lose my babies, I felt like my world was turned upside down. I also got really sick myself, sicker than i have ever been in my life. I was so scared, I had no idea what the future would bring. The kids are born and it is still hard. Everday is such a fight for them. It is so hard to sit there and see your child in so much pain. A helpless, beautiful child, that you are supposed take care of, and you can't do anything but watch.
All of this has made me realize that life is such a gift. Health is a gift. Breathing and even being able to sit up is such a gift! Its a miracle to have a child and amazing that any child is born healthy. It has also been a huge testimony builder of the priesthood and plan of salvation. It is so comforting to know that if one of our babies passes that we will be with them again someday. When I am with the kids they have a special spirit with them, and you can feel it so strongly. You can really feel the love that heavenly father has for them when we are with them. I know he is with them.
I am so glad that I am a mother and have these two beautiful children. I am so glad that I have the gospel and for the knowledge and comfort it gives me. I am so glad for a supportive ward that has given me so much love, friendship, meals, and help. I am grateful for a wonderful husband who is so supportive and loving and a great father. I am grateful for all my friends and family that have come over and done laundry, brought meals, and listened to me vent.
I think we all go through hard times in our life. Times that bring you down to your knees and make you wonder if you can go on. But it also makes you grateful for all the small things things in your life that are great. Life is great and this is how this experience has made me feel. Blessed...we are truly blessed.
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About Me
- Burnses
- The Burns family began on May 9, 2009 when Eric and I were married in the Mesa, Arizona temple for time and all eternity. Eric and I met when I was actually on a date with his friend. His friend decided to take a break during our date and use his cell phone and that is when eric moved in. We then dated for 6 months when Eric proposed by writing me a song on his guitar and playing it for me at the beach. We then were married four months later. Marriage was great, things were cruising along when we got a surprise two months later and found out we were pregnant. We couln't believe it. We did not expect it at all. We were even more surprised when two months later we found out they were twins. The babies then decided that they could not wait to come down and were born three and a half months early on December twelth. They are now in the nicu at banner desert hospital where they will stay until they are strong enough to go home. This blog is about them and their journey. Everyday they fight so hard just to live. We love them and are so proud of them. We feel so blessed.
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